Tag Archives: Michael Collins Piper

The Idaho Caucus

1. By now you are all aware of the great victory that Zionism won in Iowa. Ron Paul, the only person there worth not kicking in the balls,  received, so we are told, 21% of the vote. This means that in Iowa, a Bible-butt-plug state, almost 80% of its so-called conservatives who voted are stupid Fox-News-watching war-mongering Zionist-Bullshit-born-and-raised assholes. This is assuming that the results are not in and of themselves a pile of steaming Zionist Bullshit.

Well, the nagging and bitching tuyuur here at Mantiq al-Tayr felt that shitting-on is believing and they held their own conference of the birds (despite my arresting some of them and plucking their feathers) and demanded that we here at Mantiq al-Tayr host an “American Winter” Conference where we would question the Republicans on some issues that deeply affect the average American trying to survive the onslaught of the Federal Reserve, the Rothchilds, AIPAC and bad patriot radio.

So was born the “Idaho Caucus”. Yes, the (sad) state of Idaho is now the location of the most important of all primaries. On the eve of the Idaho Caucus, which takes place on the 33rd of January, we here at Mantiq al-Tayr hosted all of the Republican candidates not in the cross-hairs of the Mossad and we even had a couple of recent drop outs drop in as well. The major voting on January 33 will be in Idaho’s capital city, Bumfuck, a city which whose mayor,  Marcus Glennius,  is struggling to keep above water.

Bumfuck’s mayor welcomes you 

(click here for source photo. It’s from the 2008 movie “Big Game” which I just have to see. )

The vote will be held in Bumfuck’s largest town hall, the Hatikvah Dome, in downtown Bumfuck at the corner of Deir and Yassin streets named in memory of the Holocaust.

Times are tough in Bumfuck

The candidates came into Bumfuck last night by broom and we held our interviews with them in the Bumfuck Auditorium and Recreational Center downtown between the US Army recruiting center and the local crack  house.

The candidates who spoke with us were, in alphabetical order:

Michele Bachmann

Newt Gringrich

Rick Perry

Mitt Romney

and

Rick Santorum

We didn’t invite Ron Paul because, well, it’ll be obvious pretty soon.

Anyway, here’s how the interview, led by yours truly, went down:

(Note to Shas Party members, this is satire. Red highlights are not only mine, but they are the only actual quotes.)

MT: Mr. Santorum, let’s begin with you. Lots of older voters voted for you in Iowa yet you favor cuts in social security by raising the retirement age to something like 105 and for turning part of the system over to a bunch of crooks in the private sector. Once people in their late 50’s and early 60’s figure this out, do you think you have a Herman Cain’s chance in a NOW convention of getting elected?

Santorum – Right now the single most important thing this country can do is put aside more money for Israel. My program will allow us to give Israel three or four times as much each year for the development of its military and to consolidate the emerging Israeli cities in Judea and Samaria. As you know All the people who live in the West Bank are Israelis.  There are no Palestinians.  This is Israeli land.”

MT: Mr. Gingrich, perhaps you could answer the question about social security. What is the future of this fund that so many Americans have paid so much into?

Gingrich: Rick Santorum is a traitor to the state of Israel. My program will allow us to directly transfer social security taxes to holocaust survivors in Israel while allowing us to give Israel 5 to 6 times the current aid Israel officially gets from the United States.  “The Palestinian claim to a right of return is based on a historically false story,” “These people are terrorists. They teach terrorism in their schools.” I say fuck’em.

MT: Ah, Mr. Cain, we weren’t expecting you to show up for this. Since you are here, perhaps you could address the question of the future of social security.

Cain: Social security, that’s uh, that’s uh, well it has social in it so that must mean its socialistic or something. I’ll get back to you once my biographers tell me what to say.  “I think that the so-called Palestinian people have this urge for unilateral recognition because they see this president as weak.” I say let’s just clean out the whole area and if a bunch of these so-called Palestinians die, well that’s just tough shit. Oh, and my program to wipe out social security completely now and forever will allow us to give Israel each year 10 times what it is getting now. By the way, I really like Jewish pussy.

MT: Ms. Bachmann, perhaps you could bring some sanity to this discussion, but I digress. Anyway, please let our aging population know how a Bachmann administration would swallow, handle, the social security issue.

Bachmann:  My plan is to simultaneously move the US embassy to Jerusalem and transfer the entire social security trust fund to the Jewish Agency my first day in office. If a bunch of old-fart anti-semites don’t like it, well we’ll just have the military arrest them as terrorists and toss their asses into Gitmo for ever. Hahahahahaha. God, I’m funny. I am the only candidate here who really is an Israeli. I’ve worked on a kibbutz. When I was there We worked on the kibbutz from 4 am to noon. We were always accompanied by soldiers with machine guns. While we were working, the soldiers were walking around looking for land mines. I really learned a lot in Israel.” “I am a Christian, but I consider my heritage Jewish, because it is the foundation, the roots of my faith as a Christian.” See, my heritage is Jewish, which means I am Jewish pussy. Keep your hands off of me Herman, you schvartse. Jesus fucking Christ, the last thing we need is another dumb schvartse in the White House.  See, I really am Jewish. Anyway, under my plan, the US could give Israel 20 to 30 times what it is giving now. Oh, did I mention that I am the only candidate who made an entire video dedicated to Israel, you can go here to see it on youtube.

MT: Mr. Gingrich, uh, what is it you are listening to right now on your Ipod?  I need you to talk about social security and other issues of critical importance to the average American.

Gingrich: I’m listening to this incredible broadcast about me damn near getting arrested by the FBI back in the 90’s for  a huge bribe scheme involving a bunch of Israelis and pro-Israeli Jews. It’s by Mike Piper, never heard of the guy, but man he has basically proven my devotion to the state of Israel – unlike all these anti-semitic candidates you’ve gathered here. Look, social security has the half-life of one of my marriages. Forget it you bunch of pathetic losers. No one gives a rat’s ass about your stupid little social security checks.  What you all need to do is support my program to wipe out the Palestinians – not that they even exist –  but I digress. Let me finish listening to this thing. You know, you should make his website your featured website on your next post.

MT: Mr. Romney, you are immensely wealthy to a degree that is obscene really. How do you feel about helping out little old ladies living on social security?

Romney: First of all Israel is our only ally in the Middle East and I need to correct the anti-semitic statements of my colleagues here.  ” I will travel to Israel on my first foreign trip. I will reaffirm as a vital national interest Israel’s existence as a Jewish state. I want the world to know that the bonds between Israel and the United States are unshakable.” And as soon as I get to Israel I will get on my knees on the tarmac and give Netanyahu a blow job. Furthermore, I will pay not just to move the US embassy to Jerusalem, but I’ll also move the goddamn US Congress there too, this will cut down on the need for all those congressional trips to Israel. And I’ve decided to give all of my wealth to the Jewish National Fund and I will probably have Camp David moved into Kiryat Arba. In my first Defense Authorization Act, I will see to it that Israel gets 40 times as much money from the US as it does now and I’ll have anyone who objects to this treated as a terrorist, arrested by the military and sent to Gitmo forever. Now what was your question?

MT: Mr. Perry, any comments on the future of social security? Can any of you mother fuckers even spell social security?

Perry: First of all, I have already given Netanyahu a blow job. Second I consider the Israeli settlements to be legal, from my perspective, and I support them.” In fact, I think they should build even more settlement’s, after all “it’s their land.” When I become president Strategic defensive aid, strategic aid in all forms, will increase to Israel,” because Israel will be “the cornerstone of my larger global strategy.” I mean, who gives a fuck about the United States being a cornerstone of US policy? You’d have to be fucking nuts. Israel yesterday, today and forever. Jesus loves you and he wants you to kill the Palestinians, the Iranians, in fact, pretty much everybody. Praise Jesus. Oh, and I’ll see to it that Israel gets 666 times the money it presently gets from the American taxpayers.


MT: Mr. Santorum, back in the 1960’s manufacturing accounted for 25% of the GDP in these United States. Today, manufacturing is about 10% of US GDP. What can you do to re-invigorate this once vital sector of the US economy which provided good jobs for average Americans?

Santorum:  Well, look at it like this. Iran is Israel’s enemy, therefore Iran is our number one enemy and we need to put an end to Iranian hegemony in, well, in Iran to start with. You know those Shi’ites have nukes up to their assholes, so I say we start a great big fucking war with Iran. This will put Americans back to work and will probably also kill quite a few of these useless eaters off.  I have a long history of advocating wars for Israel – you can see this 2006 interview where I basically just made up everything I said out of thin air and you can see me foaming at the mouth during this very recent interview where I note that Israel is setting the standard for what the US should be doing in Iran in terms of perpetrating acts of international terrorism.  And, speaking of Mike Piper, Gingrich is full of shit when he says that Piper shows that Gingrich is the ideal bitch for Israel. Right here in this latest podcast of Piper’s he shows that I am da bitch when it comes to bending over forward and backward for Israel. And yeah, you need to feature his website.

MT: Okay, one last question and since all you people care about is Israel, I’ll ask about that. How many more people must die for the state of Israel? Let’s start with you Herman.

Cain: It’s not about dying, just like General Eisenhower said. Hmmmm, I think it was Eisenhower, you know, the guy who they made that movie about. Anyway, maybe it was General Marshal, or Custer, can’t remember. Oh Lee, that’s who it was.   Anyway, it’s not about dying for our country Israel, it’s about killing for Israel. Let’s bring on that shit!

MT:  Mr. Perry, you’ve been pretty silent. How many more people must die for Israel?

Perry: Not sure, but why even ask? Anyone who dies fighting for Israel goes straight to heaven so I say let’s send all of our poor people over to Iraq, Iran, Libya, Yemen, Somalia, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Syria and England to achieve martyrdom. Then we won’t have to pay them shit. No social security, no nothing. And if we give a few pieces of tin as medals to some of them, they’ll be willing to die some more. Fuck, and you people think I’m a stupid son of bitch! I am, of course, but you fuckers vote for me and people like me, you get what you deserve.

MT: England?

Romney: Yeah, fuck the queen, I’ve never liked that royalty shit.

MT: Maybe we can talk later, but I digress.

MT: Well goys and girls that wraps it up here in Bumfuck, Idaho. We’re fucked and I am signing off.  If we are lucky, the Mayans were right.

And it was then that I awoke in a cold sweat. All the tuyuur here at Mantiq al-Tayr were quite relieved. “It was just a nightmare,” they told me, “calm down, have some Israeli hummus.”

It was a nightmare. And it is a nightmare.

Your nightmare.

2. Here’s a very short video by the great folks at Sheikh and Bake Productions. I think they made it so short specifically so that Shas Party members would not have their attentions spans exceeded.

The Zionist Bullshit Filter

1. The past months  have seen incredible storms all over the United States, a Wolf Blitzerkrieg that has brutally hit the northeast, the entire east coast the midwest the northwest and even all the way south as far as Austin, Texas. Yes, basically since the time Baruch Obama muffed taking the Oaf of Office, the lower 48 states, plus Alaska and Hawai, have been hit hard by and buried deep in tons and tons of Zionist Bullshit.   The Main Stein Media’s vicious assault is ubiquitous, inescapable. The New York Times, The Washington Post,  and all the Zell-owned Zionist hasbara tools like the Baltimore Sun, the Chicago Tribune and the LA Times, all the major magazines, Time, Newsweek, US News and World Report, Commentary, the New Republic, The Atlantic Monthly, you name em, all the alphabet television networks – all of them – and radio airwaves are bombarding us constantly with the likes of Wolf Sheister, Glenn Beckstein, Rush Limbaugh, Michael Savage,  female impersonator Ann Coulter, Laura Ingrate, Alan Derwoshitz and on and on and on. Oh, and let’s not forget two my very own favorites, Ethan Bonner and Howard Schneider. Sorry, I forgot to mention National Purim Radio’s Linda Gradstein, married to a former Israeli sniper.  (NPR refuses, according to Allison Weir, to say whether or not Linda Gradstein is an Israeli citizen. Her husband and children are.)  It is an unending, relentless, merciless assault covering the entire nation feet deep in Zionist Bullshit.  Even Hawaii is lathered in it, despite the best efforts of Mike Rivero, may he live long, prosper and found his own network.

2. But we here at Mantiq al-Tayr have a solution. All the various tuyuur here at Mantiq al-Tayr have been hard at work to produce a device that will help you crawl out of the sink hole of Zionist Bullshit into which at this point you are going down faster and faster.  Yes indeed goys and girls, now you can, if you use our new device twice a day, see results in just days and in a matter of weeks you will find that you suddenly have more time to do things you like, your mental energy will be that of a person years younger, your insight will be like that of Michael Collins Piper, and your outlook on life will be forever changed.  What you need is the one and only  Mantiq al-Tayr-certified Zionist Bullshit Filtertm pictured below.

The Zionist Bullshit Filter Lite

This easy-to- use device is guaranteed to remove hundreds of newspaper column inches of Zionist Bullshit from your newspapers each day. Plus, if cleaned properly,  it will remove up to 500 megabytes of Zionist audio and video bullshit from radio and television programs you “enjoy” on your computer, DVR, or on DVD.  Once your newspapers and radio and tv programs have been purged of all the Zionist Bullshit that is in them, you’ll won’t have to spend so much time reading and listening to crap you know is bullshit and waste all that time filtering it out yourself.

Here’s proof.

Back in early February we exposed some of the nefarious work of groups like Ateret Cohanim, which is nothing short of a human trafficking organization which gets the majority of its funding from US tax-deductible contributions, and which also has a very special relationship with Israeli spy and American traitor Jonathan Pollard.  We pointed out that Ateret Cohanim illegally has built and populated a seven-story a house on Palestinian land in Jerusalem and dedicated it to Jonathan Pollard even naming it after him: Beit Yehonatan – Hebrew for “Jonathan’s House.”

Shortly after we did this, Howard Schneider, the current Jerusalem based Zionist propagandist for the Jerusalem Washington New York Times Post [JWNYTP], wrote a piece that in-part featured Beit Yehonatan – giving it quite the sympathetic portrayal – I’m sure you are shocked.  The piece is so full of Zionist Bullshit you’d need a whole bottle of Bronfman-owned scotch to swallow it all.

Speaking of the Sheikh Jarrah neighborhood, another place where Arabs are losing their homes to Jewish fanatics, Schneider makes it sound like it is no big deal at all:

“On a citywide scale, the stakes do not seem so momentous, involving just a few acres of land and a few dozen families. Jerusalem’s Arab population as a percentage of the city’s total is about 35 percent and climbing — in seeming contradiction to charges that Israeli policies are “Judaizing” the city.”

Those fucking Arabs, what are they bitching about? They are 35% of the population of their own city that Jews stole from them. Ungrateful bastards.

Then we get a section of the piece called “Jewish Attachment” and we learn all about, well, not quite all about, Beit Yehonatan, which Schneider spells slightly differently.  Red highlights are mine.

Jewish attachment

It is in other neighborhoods — from Sheikh Jarrah, north of the Old City, to the hillside neighborhood of Silwan and beyond to the south — where the tension with Jewish attachment to the area becomes more acute, playing out on a house-by-house basis.

On Silwan’s northern ridge, for example, a community that began as a haven for Yemenite Jews in the late 1800s is now virtually all Arab — except for the seven-story Beit Yonatan building, marked by a Star of David flag hanging down its length. To Luria, Beit Yonatan’s presence in Silwan simply marks the return of Jews to a neighborhood where they had lived until the ethnic strife that preceded Israel’s founding forced them out.

He adds more blathering by Luria about the situation in Silwan and of course tosses in a quote or two of people critical of what’s going on – most of it, but not all, just diluted forms of Zionist Bullshit.

But what Schneider does not mention, and I cannot believe he does not know this, though it is also possible that his editors at the Jerusalem Washington New York Times Post just wouldn’t include it, is that  Beit Yohanatan is literally dedicated to the notorious Israeli spy Jonathan Pollard. Leaving this information out is another example of disgraceful Zionist Bullshit.

Oh, let me sort of digress for second. Did you know that Pollard is actually involved with Beit Yehonatan from his jail cell in these United States? Did you know he gets visited by fanatical Israeli Rabbis and they pass messages back to Israel for him?  Red highlights are mine.

A meeting last month between the Dean of Yeshivat Merkaz HaRav, Rabbi Yaakov Shapira, and Jonathan Pollard in the latter’s US Federal prison cell may have consequences for Jewish – and Arab – construction in eastern Jerusalem.

Rabbi Shapira visited Pollard in his jail cell five weeks ago, together with Rabbi Pesach Lerner, who is Executive Vice President of the National Council of Young Israel. At one point, when Rabbi Shapira asked him what specifically he can do for Pollard back in Israel, Pollard answered, “I am very concerned for Beit Yehonatan. It needs to be looked after and made sure that not only is it not destroyed or evacuated, but that it becomes a center of Torah and prayer.”

Shapira is the son of an insane Rabbi who “During the days of the Oslo Accords, Shapira was one of the founders of an organization that declared that handing over parts of the land of Israel to gentiles, even with a peace agreement, contradicted halacha and was therefore forbidden.”

The Yeshiva Shapira heads is very influential in Israel. So Jonathan Pollard, from his prison cell, is helping to create more ethnic tension in Jerusalem, against US official policy and in violation of international law. Pollard is being allowed to continue his treasonous behavior right from his prison cell. That, goys and girls, is pure unadalterated 100 percent Zionist Bullshit.  Schneider doesn’t breath a word of it to you. Wonder why?

Now, back to the ZBF.  Here’s how it works. You can take any newspaper article, or even an entire newspaper, magazine or book and feed it directly into the front end. It will scan every word of every page and will delete all the Zionist Bullshit and then will print out what’s left.

So we took Schneider’s entire article and ran it through the ZBF.  We set the ZBF’s adustable filter to “high” meaning “any sentence that has any Zionist Bullshit is to be removed.” Out of the entire article, the only thing the ZBF put out was the following quote by one of the Palestinians being screwed by the evictions in the Sheikh Jarrah area.

“We don’t want to let them stay here,” he said, nodding toward his former home, where a large menorah now adorns the roof. At the opposite end of the building, Ramadan lights were still on display, put up by a Palestinian family whose case is pending in the courts.

“We don’t want them to rest in peace and quiet,” Ghawi said of the new occupants. “We want to show the world they are sleeping in our homes.”

3. The Zionsit Bullshit Filtertm can also be hooked up to your computer and it will pull all the Zionist Bullshit out of your radio shows, podcasts, DVD’s  anything.  You will save yourself hours. On average, videos done by Alex Jones are reduced to about 15 minutes. [In a planned upgrade, we will add a “remove bullhorn bullshit” setting which will save you even more time.] RBN  programs come out with almost no commercials in them – some RBN shows, like Michael Collins Piper’s and Hesham Tillawi’s process quite nicely – commercial free and some of the callers are blipped out, especially that drunk asshole from West Virginia who keeps calling in,  but you get all the good stuff from Hesham and Mike. [In yet another planned upgrade, we are going to add to Hesham’s show things Mark Glenn would have said if had not been banned from RBN by Stadmiller.]   Current Issues TV goes through the machine untouched. Frosty Wooldridge’s written and audio material is completely eliminated!  ZBF owners will proudly live in a Frosty-Free Environment (FFE).

In the mornings, I just take the whole newspaper and run it through the ZBF while I’m taking a shower and when I have my breakfast, I can read the whole paper in just five minutes. It gives me more time to listen to (and read) Michael Collins Piper, The Ugly Truth with Mark Glenn and The Liberty Hour with Phil Tourney and Mark Glenn. I’ve lost weight, my prostate has returned to a normal size, my kids love me again, and my wife has an even more pleasant smile on her face all the time.

And there are so many different applications for this G-d-sent product. Looking for a job? And who isn’t thanks to Islamofascist Ben Shalom Bernanke and his friends? Well, run the Want-Ads from the newspapers or any Internet site through your new ZBF and filter out all the outfits run by Zionist controlled corporations . How about a sports team to root for?  Well this will sure as hell narrow that down. Looking for a good restaurant or Deli? You can rely on the Zionist Bullshit Filter.

As for local, state and national representatives? You are fucked. And the ZBF will tell you so. . .

Before moving on to the new theory behind the collapse of WTC7, I want to link to the following excellent article by Alison Weir because it will give new readers some insight into how much Zionist Bullshit is coming your way.

The article is called “All in the Family“.  Read it and order your ZBF as soon as you can. [Note: Ms. Weir and her excellent website “If Americans Knew” do not receive any compensation from sales of the ZBF.]

4.  Now folks, this is the part of the post where I normally include either a video of a stupid cat, in honor of the Anonymous Arabist, or a video of a pleasant looking female vocalist.  Sometimes both.   Now in our last post, we gave you a plethora of cat and vocalist videos but we actually had a hidden agenda. We included within those video files the clue to the real reason behind the collapse of WTC-7. To our great sadness, shock, awe, disappointment, grief, anxiety and just plain horror, not one reader got the clue – or if they did they were afraid to put anything in the comments section for fear of the wrath of the catophile Anonymous Arabist. who, if she had her way, would put Cat Woman in charge of the Washington Redskins. Hmmm, not a bad idea actually.  But I digress.

Anyway, two of the videos clearly explain the real reason for the collapse of the WTC-7.  But first a quick review of the situation so that Shas Party Members (SPMs) will be able to follow.

The National Institute for Story Telling (the NIST) has explained that a new phenomenon in the world of pecuniary-based physics called “thermal expansion” is what’s behind the collapse of the building in just a few seconds falling into its own footprint like the melting wicked witch in the Wizard of Oz.

Other people posit the theory that the building was brought down by controlled demolition.

Now lets take a few seconds and look at the key video from our last post, the one that “let’s the cat out of the bag” so to speak.  The video below was the second video in that series. What we did not explain to you was that this cat was actually inside WTC-7 at the time it was frightened. Now watch the cat and how it hard it hits the wall.

Seconds later this is what happened.

The real cause of the total utter collapse of WTC-7 into its own footprint in a matter of seconds was not “thermal expansion” but rather the cause was, as we say (badly) in Latin: Feles Exitium.  “Cat Destruction.”

The people at the NIST should be ashamed of themselves.

Now, we have to find out how BBC correspondent Jane Standley knew in advance that the pussy cat was going to take down the building?  Was it her cat?

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Special Offer!!!  Order now!  Order the Zionsit Bullshit Filtertm and The Tafsirantortm and The Full Brain Scannertm all together and save millons of shekels today! Just call the Israeli Embassy in Washington DC at (202) 364-5500 and tell them that you are fed up with Zionist Bullshit and that you want the package discount and they’ll be pretty pissed off.  It’s not toll-free but it’s worth it.