Reposted: Have You Killed a Palestinian Today?

1. In the good old days when the Summer and Winter Olympics were hosted in some really odd country, Canada for some reason comes to mind, the hosts used to be able to introduce their own sport to the smorgasbord of increasingly ridiculous sporting events that are the fruit of the “Olympic Movement” as the rich like to call it. So, maybe the Canadians would have introduced curling but they were beaten to this by the French in 1924. Anyway, a host country could push to have one of its sports as a “demonstration sport” to further the sport’s popularity.

Embracing the universalist elitism of the “Olympic Movement” and keeping in step with the mores of globalism, the tuyuur here at Mantiq al-Tayr very much hope that the Olympics will soon be hosted by Israel or by its satellite country, The United States of America. If the games are hosted in the US, then we recommend that waterboarding be introduced as a demonstration sport.  In fact, recent events have provided excellent victims to be publically waterboarded by Israeli-trained CIA contractors and the winner would be the one who gets the most outrageous confession from these four morons who were set up by the FBI. (While Rosen and Weissman get off. Oh, and where the hell is Edward Mosberg? An email from Mantiq al-Tayr to the author of the article sent two days ago asking if Mosberg has come back to the US or not remains unanswered.)

However, in the interests of providing a really entertaining demonstration sport that will stimulate the loins of everyone from AIPAC to Judith Miller, we here at Mantiq al-Tayr held a minyan and bobbed our heads up and down begging Shadai to have the Olympics held in Israel’s eternal capital (no, not New York you smart asses), Jerusalem.

The Israeli national pass time is finding creative ways to murder Palestinian men, women and children. They are very good at it and probably would take the Gold, Silver and Bronze medals. Still, it’s great fun and I’m sure that the US and the UK would at least give the Izzies a run for their money that they took from us.

So, for example, let’s take the case of Israeli Border patrolmen Shachar Butbika and Dennis al-Hazub. They won a gold medal in 2002 for abducting a 17 year old Palestinian boy, beating the shit out of him, and then kicking him off the top of their patrol car as it roared down the road at 80 kph.  His head smashed into the pavement and the impact killed him. What made this one even more fun was that the boy violated Israeli law by resisting their efforts to toss him off the patrol car – kind of like a battle you have when you catch a big fish and real it in. Hahaha-Aretz reports:

He was beaten by Butbika and then forced to jump from the moving vehicle. He resisted, holding onto the jeep’s roof, but was eventually forced out. One of the officers shouted “he’s dead.” They drove away, without offering medical assistance, and tried to eliminate the evidence.

The 17 year old boy’s name is: ‘Imran Abu Hamdiya

Here is a photo of him.

Imran Abu Hamdiya

Imran Abu Hamdiya

Butbika and al-Hazub also won the silver medal that day as well. For earlier in the day they picked up another Palestinian youth, 20 year old Alaa Sankrut.  Sankrut

was hauled onto the jeep, driven to a discreet location and kicked and beaten with a pickaxe handle, sustaining skull fractures

Unfortunately, Butbika and al-Hazub fucked up and the guy lived, much to the dismay of Rabbis throughout the land.

You anti-Semites might be pleased to know that Butbika, al-Hazub and two more of their cohorts were sentenced to several years in jail recently – having somehow been convicted of manslaughter, yes, manslaughter, not premeditated murder, manslaughter.  They’ll spend about as much time in jail as Michael Vick.

Hunting Palestinians is a game that goes on every day and each day more and more interesting ways of scoring are being invented. This past week two IDF dudes used an ice cream truck to drive around the West Bank. No doubt the truck could be counted on to bring children within point blank range and if you get a clean shot, you get a t-shirt. Unfortunately for these two clowns, they didn’t coordinate their activity with their partners in crime, the Palestinian police, so when the Good Humor Izzies opened fire, the Palestinians fired back – clearly in violation of the Torah.

Yes indeed, Palestinian Plugging can sometimes be a dangerous sport, sort of like automobile racing and sometimes the driver gets killed. Then everyone can mourn and cry and glory in self-sacrifice and in general be a complete total sanctimonious asshole.

For example, in this case, the hunter ended up getting killed by his prey. We learn all about what a wonderful hunter he was, coming to Israel from that great bastion of virulent anti-Semitism known as Canada at the tender age of eight. But 10 years later he was a professional Palestinian Plugger.  He even once tried (in vain) to save the life of a “terrorist” (“terrorist” is the Hebrew term for “Palestinian”) who had been shot by IDF hunters. He was a “big hearted” Palestinian plugger.

Cry me a river.

2. Now that the US economy has gone down the sewer and the banks, all owned by Islamofacists, have gotten about 12 trillion dollars, some of you out there in Mantiq land may be looking for jobs. Well, how about going to Israel to teach English?  Judy Steiner wants you.

“There is always a shortage of English teachers and you have to ask, where are you going to find new ones?” Dr. Judy Steiner, Chief Inspector for English Language Education in Israel told Haaretz.

Given the current financial problems in the United States, the Ministry of Education and the Jewish Agency hope to find more Anglos willing to consider an exciting future in teaching English to Israeli youth.

Just think of what a great challenge this would be. Hebrew only has two tenses, basically past and present. But English has trillions, so teaching the complex and subtle English tenses to semites can be difficult. You’ll have to teach them all sorts of conditional clauses and how to use them properly in English. Examples:

“If I had known he was a Palestinian, I would have thrown him off of the roof of the patrol car.”

How about this real quote:

“We have to make sure that no Palestinian individual remains under our occupation. If they (Palestinians) escape then it is good; but if anyone of them remains, then he should be exterminated”.

Or this real quote:

“behind the Kotel we have a mosque. But when they pray even though they are in our holiest place, they face Mecca. Their back is to Jerusalem. So you can see from only one sign that it does not belong to them. They have nothing – no connection.”

So are you up to the challenge? Your job will be to teach the Hebrew speaking children of Russian immigrants (many of them criminals) to Israel to speak English like Meir Kahane. It’s going to be tough and you need to have the right qualifications.

“Very often when there is a shortage, we put in people who are not completely qualified. But we don’t take in anybody.” Steiner said.

No, they do not just take anybody. It turns out that you have to be a Jew.

Imagine seeing an add in the Chronicle of Higher Education:

Seeking Professor of Middle Eastern History at (blah blah) University. Only Muslims may apply.

So, put on your Yarmulka and get that job. Then you can teach the kids to read the Geneva conventions.

18 responses to “Reposted: Have You Killed a Palestinian Today?

  1. Good Lord Mantiq, after I started reading about what was really going on in our world I thought I would never laugh again, that is until I started reading your work. They need to bottle your genius and sell it to the masses as an elixer vitae.

  2. Will Wilson

    Hilarious the way you describe the absolutely contemptible. Am looking forward to the day we in Palestine West(USA) can recognize those in Palestine East as suffering from the same affliction. See, they don’t torture us, in the USA, like you, yet. They’re still finding us a source of income.

  3. I look forward to the day when real patriots in the US and Palestinians have, in their respective countires, the upper hand and put an end to inhuman zionist practices.

  4. skulz fontaine

    Yes and the Olympic Committee is to add the 1200m Bomb the Afghan Children Just For Fun event. The Olympic Gold will feature a “special” commemorative bust of Barack Obama.

  5. Mantiq,

    Thanks for such innovative piece of journalism.
    I am sending subscription to your site for Independence Day to my two blind U.S. senators and one for my mute U.S. Rep.

    It is sad day for America when we dismiss spying charges against two AIPAC operatives, then the FBI produce, finance, and pick up the targets and fake bombs for the latest make believ plot. Ofcourse the actors were newylreleased prisoners. Now the FBI stands on three pillars: Fear, Hate, and Smear.

    Palestinians will never bow their heads or bend their knews for their FREEDOM.

    Viva Palestina!
    From a Retired USAF Veteran

  6. The point of waterboarding innocent Arabs isn’t so that the mossad trained CIA can prevennt a future terrorist attack [after all they’re the terrorists], it’s to force innocent Arabbs to connfess to the very terrorist acts that the CIA and Mossad have themselves committed. Read Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn’s Gulag Archepeligo, The Jewish infested NKVD/KGB did this for decades. The Jewish infested American military’s post war prosecution team did it to Julius Streicher and many others. Read about how they tortured Streicher below:

  7. Dr. William Pierce said, the main problem lies not so in Jews themselves (whose nature is clear) as in their collaborating accomplices worldwide who worship them and spoil the normal people… In this respect the Kremlin schmucks, however David Duke praised “Russian patriot Putin” (shiver in my spine), differ no yota from their Western counterpart shabbos-goyishe subhumans…
    “America and Israel declared war against God”
    (The last interview of martyr Abdel-Aziz al-Rantissi to Russian newspaper “Zavtra” in Gaza)

    “Today we, Palestinians, are the advanced detachment of humanity fighting against dark satanic powers that strive to enslave and subjugate the whole world. We have no doubt, however long this struggle lasted, devilish american-zionist project in the end, by Allah’s Will, shall be pulled out with its root…

    Christians believe that Jesus (peace be with him) sacrificed himself for the sake of all humanity. We live under the heel of occupiers, and daily encountering with Israeli terror, we are ready to sacrifice ourselves for the sake of our people and our holy cause, ready to perish but not to deny our dignity…

    Jews are absolutely indifferent to our sufferings, they are completely lacking in ability to sympathize and understand others. [Nothing is more descriptive of these folks than the indifference with which they’ll watch a Goy die…] While they are never tired to trumpet to the world about their own pains and sufferings. In the Bible Jews are called hard-necked people. Today they remain the very same as they were hundreds and thousands years ago: others’ pain and others’ suffering mean for them precisely nothing…

    So the noble Jihad against Zionists should become the daily priority cause for all believers, irrespective of circumstances, difficulties and victims. Every crime committed by America and Israel will only enhance our resolution to strive against those who opposed themselves with the whole mankind, and even dared to challenge the Almighty Himself…”

    The similar situation in Palestine, in Iraq, in Lebanon… as we’ve got it in Russia and Ukraine since 1918 – they have been doing it with the same methods…

    But what worked well with Russians and other Slavs (now Americans and Europeans), won’t work with Moslems. As Hassan Nasrallah declared to JSA and Izzyrathell, “Lebanon is not Ukraine or Gruzia, here you will arrive at nothing…”

  8. Sheckel Gruber

    the good news tonight was that a recent poll in Israel says that 25 percent plan to ’emigrate’ if Iran develops a bomb. I seen a bomb. it was big, ir was red. it said on the side ‘death to uh, israel’ or something like that.

    now, get the fuck out, but take more than 25 percent of you when you go.

    instant solution: I SAW A BOMB, it wuz NOOK YOO LUR, fo sho!!! *obombya mimicking his sea daddy, george dumbya bush*

  9. Don’t forget that other IOF sport, tossing Palestinians off rooftops to see if they can fly.

    And lobbing in artillery shells onto beaches to see what blows up.

    There should be one Olympic sport dedicated to our Congress.

    At one end of the stadium, “Boom -Boom” Netanyahu would be standing, with his pants to his ankles.
    At the other end, any number of our loyal Senators and Reps would be standing, waiting for the starter’s pistol to crack.

    Then they would run as fast as they can, to see who would be the first to plant loving smoochies on “Boom-Boom’s” stinky derrière.

    Those that can’t run, could compete to see how many kisses they could tenderly plant on Netty’s ass.

  10. I wear my black ribbon to remind all who see me that I sorrow and mourn the unknown multitude of Palestinians who have died and who still must die for the Zionist monster.

  11. Felow Traveller

    Oft times, sarcstic wit, tempered with genuine humor is a very effective weapon against inhuman blood thirsty savage and bestial acting individuals.

    I’d like to think that this article thoroughly represents that notion.

    There ain’t nothing quite so negative as a truly comedic essay against white phosphorus bombs dropping, women and children tank crushing, goose stepping, helicopter gunship missile firing, wannabe, Rule the World, individuals, than true laughter at these selfsame individuals who are reputedly, PERSONALLY CHOSEN, by Almighty God Himself in the Heavens Above, no less, to perpetrate War Crimes and Crimes Against Humanity against the Whole of that Humanity.

    [Read: “Every living Goy”]

    Therefore, I reserve my personal opinions as regards the actions of the Zionists, in as I am dependent upon the federal government’s kindness in paying my monthly military service disability checks.

    Likewise, I don’t need a 0400 AM visit from a Mossad trained, Homeland Security Force, smashing down my door, firing grenades through my windows, and killing women, children and pets in my house, then dragging me off to some Made in the USA , Gulag extermination camp.

    NOT in this lifetime at least.


    That said,

    I WILL, however, confess to more than a few chuckles, and at least one LOUD outright guffaw….. engendered through the reading of this article. *

    Fellow Traveller….”travelling with other fellows world-side for over ten years by now”

    * So how’s that for some compound tense word-smithing..?? HaHaha! ft

  12. mantiqaltayr

    Dear FT,

    Good bless you.

    I’m glad you enjoyed the post and I hope you will visit often and comment.


  13. Brilliant piece of writing MT – and getting better all the time
    God Bless
    Salam :)

  14. Not bad for a white guy…

  15. I have a good idea for a new Olympic sport: hunting terrorists!

    All those cowardly, murdering American and Jew and English (all the same disease of earth) terrorists in Palestine and Iraq and Afghanistan and elswehere who think they are so macho and brave warriors because they can shoot and kill defenseless, innocent and usually hungry men, women and children will be in deep doo-doo!

    I would feel so motivated that I would be compelled to take out that out old hunting rifle and start practicing.

  16. Thank you for that. It’s really imformative stuff.
    I love to browse!

    apple valley teeth whitening

  17. Pingback: Message to Congress: Take a Slow Boat to Gaza [Satire] | Sabbah Report

  18. Pingback: Message to Congress: Take a Slow Boat to Gaza [Satire] | Creativity, Culture, Palestine, Politics | Arab Stands